She starts out by telling a story she remembered from primary when she was just a little girl.
She (the primary teacher) challenged each of us to live the next week like Jesus right beside us. She told us a story about a girl who decided to do that. This girl went in her yard and picked flowers to put on the table because she wanted everything around her to be as nice as possible because she was acting like Jesus was next to her. Our teacher told us that she was going to check with us the following week to see how we did. I remember going home really fired up: I was going to live for one whole week like Jesus Himself was right with me. That was something I'd never thought to do before! For some reason, I was convinced that we, too, needed flowers on our table. I remember walking around our yard. There weren't any flowers. I was devastated. How could I live my week correctly without flowers on the table? I'm not sure how it happened, but somwhere during that week I learned a great lesson. Flowers were fine, but not necessary. What Jesus really cared about from me was how I treated the people around me. Was I kind to my brothers and sisters? That mattered so much more than flowers! When I look back, I realize that God answered my little girl prayers and let me know that who I am matters so much more than what I have!I think she spent her life demonstrating that people are more important than things and that what she had didn't matter.
She goes on to talk about a friend she had in college. They had a conversation where he questioned my mom and wanted to know how she had received her testimony. He wanted to know what had happened in her life to make her know and when she was converted. She wrote how she didn't know how to answer him and started question herself. Here's what she said.
For the first time in my life I wondered what a testimony was. I'd thought I had a testimony, but Dave acted like something big and profound had to happen for someone to say they had a testimony....I was rather embarrassed because I believed, but I couldn't say why I believed. I asked God to tell me if I had a testimony. I asked the bishop to find someone who could give me a Priesthood blessing. He did. In that blessing I was told that I did have a testimony. I was told that my mother had given me faith. Ever since that incredible blessing I've wondered what I appreciate more: the life my mother gave me (I was the ninth child, yet she was so thrilled to have me!) or the faith she gave me. I've finally decided that the faith she gave me is what made the life she gave me worth living!
I too am grateful for the faith my grandma gave my mom because my mom, in turn, gave me that same faith. I also know that it's that faith that got my mom through the last few years of her life that were so difficult. I find comfort in knowing that she is back with her mom and that now they're both watching over my family and giving us faith and strength to make it through our trials.
The next part of her letter talks about a talk given by a return missionary. The mission president had asked him if he loved Jesus. He said, "Yes. I love Him so much I would die for Him." His mission president told him that wasn't enough. He needed to love Jesus so much that he was willing to live for Him.
I've thought about that a lot over the years. Jesus had that kind of perfect love for us. He loved us so much that He lived and died for us. Because of His living, His dying brought about the resurrection for all of us. Joseph Smith love Jesus enought to live and die for Him. Again, because of his living, his death was significant. I've thought a lot about Grandma Willis. Because she lived for Jesus, we know He's taking care of her now. We all really need to live for Jesus!My mom could pass on peacefully knowing that she too lived her life for Jesus. Everything she did revolved around her beliefs and her faith.
I want to share the last paragraph in her own writing. She had beautiful cursive and always took great pride in her penmanship. It was hard for her and all of us when her hands got too weak to write.
I just wanted to take the time to share this with all of you. Obviously at that time she had no idea that she only had 9 short years left to live, but her faith and testimony were unwavering. I can see that even from the time she was a little girl she was being prepared for what life had in store for her and spent her life preparing to return to her Heavenly Father. Her example gives me the strength to make it through the trials I face in my life.
Merry Christmas from the whole Niederhauser Family!
-Nicole
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